Sherlock Texts
by City of Lunatics
Summary: A series of texts between practically everybody. I do prompts!
1. Sombreros

**Hi everybody! This is a series of random texts and I do take prompts so if you want a certain person or a certain thing to be featured tell me and I'll try and get it in somewhere! :) **

Seb JM

Seb JM

Seb JM

Sebby JM

Sebby JM

Sebby JM

Tiger JM

Tiger JM

Tiger JM

Bas JM

Bas JM

Bas JM

Bastian JM

Bastian JM

Bastian JM

Sebby-Bear JM

Sebby-Bear JM

Sebby-Bear JM

Sebastian JM

Sebastian JM

Sebastian JM

Moran JM

Moran JM

Moran JM

FOR GODS SAKES JIM WHAT!? SM

Hi JM

What? Did you really just disturb me to say that? SM

No. JM

Then why did you disturb me? JM

BORED JM

And? SM

Do something JM

Jim, I'm trying to shoot someone here. I can't entertain you. SM

*pouts* JM

That never works SM

RARGH JM

Yeah you just seem cute when you're trying to be scary SM

:P JM

Not gracing that childish text with a comment SM

OOH THIS LOOKS FUN JM

Jim? SM

... SM

Jim, what have you done? SM

Jim. Jim. Jim? Jim? SM

JAMES MORIARTY ANSWER ME RIGHT NOW SM

OK I WILL ANSWER YOU RIGHT NOW JM

What did you just do? SM

Look on the Mexican news JM

Wha- Oh. My. God. Did you- SM

Yes. It was fun. JM

Jim! You blew up a sombrero factory! SM

What's your point? JM

I coming back to the flat. Save the sombrero manufacturers money SM

YAY I WUV WU! JM

Yeah, yeah, whatever SM

**There's this disease and if you want to help all you have to do is donate a review. So please, donate your reviews. Thank you!-Moo**


	2. Surprise!

**I REGRET NOTHING! Unfortunately, I also own nothing otherwise Johnlock, Mystrade and Mormor would exist. Also, we wouldn't have to wait a whole year for three episodes... MOFFAT! Ok, I'm done now-Moo **

John. You know how I love you so so so so so much? SH

What have you done? JW

NOTHING! Just don't go into the kitchen SH

Have you blown up the kitchen? JW

NO! I'm just... Doing something that you're not allowed to see until I say you can... SH

Sherlock, I heard the explosion JW

I thought you'd gone shopping! SH

I came back two hours ago. I came and put the shopping away while you were doing your experiment. You talked to me. JW

Where are you then? SH

I was upstairs JW

Where are you now? SH

Stop texting and look up JW

I see a cupboard. Have you transformed into a cupboard? SH

No I haven't trans- Look at the kitchen door and you will see me JW

Oh. I told you not to come to the kitchen SH

Why are you still texting me? We're in the same room JW

You're still replying by text. You'll have to start talking first. I'm too busy SH

You're too busy to start TALKING? JW

Yes SH

I'm going to see Harry. Tidy up the kitchen JW

We need milk SH

I bought it today JW

Used it for my experiment SH

WHY did you need THREE bottles of milk for your experiment? JW

I didn't. I only needed half a bottle SH

Then what happened to the other two and a half bottles of milk? JW

Got blown up SH

WAIT NO NOTHING GOT BLOWN UP SH

I've already seen the kitchen Sherlock JW

Oh yeah... Bye SH

See you later JW

**I live off reviews. Just saying.**


	3. Lol

**Hello! Here is another chapter, it isn't as good as I would have hoped but better ones are coming! Reviews are welcome whether they are con-crit, prompts or whatever! -Moo x**

****Lol

Who is this? JW

Lol

Seriously, who is texting me? JW

Rofl

Stop it JW

No. Lol

I think you have the wrong number... JW

No I don't... John Watson...

How do you know my name? Is this Mycroft? Or Sherlock? Or Jim? JW

Ooh so close... But yet so far

Do I even know you? JW

Yes

Harry? JW

No

Molly? JW

Nope

Mrs Hudson? JW

Nah

Irene Adler? JW

Uh, no. These past 4 suggestions have been most offensive. Not that two of the first ones weren't offensive.

So, one of them wasn't offensive? JW

No. I quite liked it actually.

Ummm did you find Mycroft offensive? JW

Yes, I am not the ice man.

Ok. So, I'm guessing Sherlock was offensive as well? JW

Correctamundo!

So Jim wasn't offensive... You're Moran aren't you?JW

Damn...You weren't meant to work it out that quickly... I MEAN NO IM NOT MORAN!

Sherlock told me that this was your number. JW

Oh...Meh, I don't care. SM

I'm gonna go now... JW

Sherlock is about to poison himself. SM

Why are _you_ telling me? JW

Well, boss wouldn't be too happy if I just let him kill himself, accidentally. SM

Right, ok. Whatever. I need to go...get milk now. Yeah. JW

You just went shopping SM

STOP STALKING ME JW

Oh got a job to do. Stalk you later. SM

WHAT?! NO! Ugh fine whatever. JW

:P SM


	4. Teasing

**This is in response to a review containing prompts. First prompt- John, Sherlock and Greg tease Mycroft. I hope you like this. For Arty Diane- Moo x**

Given up on the diet then Mycroft? SH

No, Sherlock. It's working rather well, in fact. M

Is that what you think? GL

Gregory, don't encourage him. M

Oh, it's a bit too late for that. JW

You as well? Honestly, I'd have thought you'd be more mature than that John. I was rather hoping you'd have an effect on him and make him less childish. M

Actually, it seems it's the other way round Mycroft. Oh, what would you like for Christmas? New umbrella, maybe? JW

He doesn't really like umbrellas anymore John. They're so thin, they make him look even fatter. SH

I thought they were for self defence. GL

If so they were pretty useless, I hit him over the head with it once, wouldn't call that defence. SH

You're all very childish and silly. What's the point in teasing people? M

It's fun. SH

Nothing else to do. GL

You spy on us, this is us getting our own back. JW

I'd expect this from Sherlock but not from you or Gregory. M

God, you're so posh! You call me Gregory! GL

It is only appropriate Gregory. M

Everyone else calls him Greg Mycroft. In this day and age we use nicknames. JW

Actually I call him Lestrade. SH

Because you only found out his name was Greg during the Baskerville case. JW

Hey, I didn't think it was me we were teasing! I thought it was the Queen. SH

I'm not the Queen. Honestly Sherlock. M

Oh, no, we forgot, you're not the Queen, you're just her best friend. JW

Hardly! M

No, no, no, no ,no! You've got it all wrong! He's the British Government! GL

Oh, he must be more than that, surely?! SH

What would you suggest? JW

Maybe... Queen of the whole world? SH

I'm not going to put up with this any longer. You're all very childish and silly. Good bye. M

See ya GL

Bye bye JW

Laters SH


	5. Everybody text everybody!

**Helllooooo! Here is another chapter for you amazing people who are kind enough to read this! :) -Moo x**

Sherlock, Moriarty has cameras in our flat JW

Yes John. Have you only just discovered that? SH

You knew? JW

Course SH

Why didn't you get rid of them then? JW

They'd just install more. Anyway you weren't this bothered about Mycroft having cameras in the flat. You didn't ask me to take those ones down. SH

That's because it's Mycroft and he isn't a consultant criminal. And someone needs to keep an eye on you when I'm out JW

I DON'T NEED LOOKING AFTER! SH

You almost poisoned yourself and I was only in the kitchen JW

I knew what I was doing! SH

It's only because Moran told me that you didn't! JW

Are you siding with him now? SH

No! JW

You should SM

Wha- oh it's you JW

Charmed I'm sure SM

Sebastian, if you're going to take part in this conversation keep your input interesting. SH

SEBBY-BEAR! JM

Sebby-Bear? JW

Sebby-Bear? SH

SEBBY-BEAR? SM

Why is everyone repeating me? JM

Uh because you called Moran 'Sebby-Bear' JW

Did I? JM

Yes, boss, you did. SM

So, is that a nickname you use often? SH

NO! SM

Yes. JM

Ok. Any other nicknames? SH

NONE! SM

Oh plenty. Seb, Sebby, Sebby-Bear, Bas, Bastian, honey, darling, Sebastian or Moran if he's not doing what I say. JM

I'm inclined to think that you, Sebastian, are not telling the truth. SH

BOSS! Why did you just tell Holmes 2 your nicknames for me? SM

Why have you suddenly started calling me boss? What happened to Jim, Jimmy and Jimmy-Cub? JM

*face-palms* SM

XD JW

WHAT DO YOU MEAN HOLMES 2? SH

I'm sure Sherlock and John have pet names JM

Well you're brother is Holmes 1 and therefore you're Holmes 2... SM

Yes but why am I Holmes 2? I'm more important than Mycroft SH

I have to disagree with you little brother M

MYCROFT SHOVE OFF SH

Not very nice, I'll have to tell Mummy about this. M

So since the beginning if this conversation Moran, Moriarty and Mycroft have joined us? JW

Correct John SH

Yes Dr Watson M

Can't you even keep track of that Johnny-Boy? But yes. JM

Has Moran left or something? JW

No, I didn't answer your question because I thought 3 replies would be more than sufficient. SM

That's quite a good point actually. JW

JOHN! STOP AGREEING WITH HIM! SH

I'm just trying to have a decent conversation. I can't have normal conversations every day so when I can I do. JW

You can have decent and normal conversations with me! SH

AND ME! JM

And you can have some of the most normal conversations with me M

Hey, what about me? GL

And me! A

Hey that's how I sign MY texts! A

Who cares? SD

She does, obviously. Molls x

Greg, Anderson, someone, Donovan and now Molly?! JW

Yes GL

Yup A

It's Anthea A

Yes, of course it's me SD

Hi John, Jim, Seb, Sherlock, Mycroft, Greg, Anderson, Anthea and Sally! Molls x

Oh um John, dear, is this a bad time? Mrs H

Mrs Hudson? Uh no it's fine. JW

Your sister is texting me Mrs H

Hi John HW

Harry? JW

Yes it is me. HW

Riiiiight. It's like bloody Piccadilly Circus! JW

Harriet please stop texting me. Mrs H

It's Harry and don't worry I've done. I was just trying to hack into this conversation. HW

SEEEEEB YOU NEED TO BE BACK AT THE FLAT IN EXACTLY A MINUTE! JM

Why? SM

Doctor Who is on. JM

*face-palms* SM

Do you like doing that Sebastian? You've done it twice in this conversation. SH

I'm at the flat Jim, don't worry. SM

QUUUUUIIIIIIIICCCCCKKK IT'S STAAARRTTING JM

John are you watching Doctor Who as well? SH

It's a good show! JW

Let's see what's so good about it... SH

Anthea, we need to go to Bulgaria, pack a suitcase, weeks stay. M

Yes sir. A

Anderson, Donovan, crime scene NOW. GL

Is it interesting? SH

No. GL

Oh :( SH


End file.
